Twas the Night Before Christmas (Rabbit Version)

Good evening! I'm Peaches, your narrator of the adaptation of the Christmas poem by Clement Clarke Moore.

Twas the Night before Christmas, and all through the hutch
Not a creature was stirring, not even Big Dutch.

"My name's not Big Dutch--it's Alice! Get that straight, or I'll come over there and kick your a@@!" (Elvis: "ooooo--she has pizzazz. I like a bun with pizzazz!")

(Alice is a rabbit available for adoption through Bright Eyes Sanctuary and Rabbit Rescue. Photo copyright 2008 by Patti Henningsen.

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care, in hopes that Sid the Iguana soon would be there.
Elvis: "Sid the Iguana?!"
Sid: "That's right, St. Nicholas retired years ago--it's been my gig for the last 50 years or so. And I'm retiring now. Going to Florida, gonna bet on the ponies at Hialeah, gonna go to the beach and check out the babes, gonna work on my tan. Life is short, kid. There's a new guy taking over--his name is Pink."

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foots
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and doots.
His eyes--how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like cotton, his eyes like two cherries!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow.

Pink: "There are going to be a few changes around here. I've traded in the reindeer for this guy. With global warming, I don't think we're going to be needing reindeer--except maybe in Seattle. The camel will work for everywhere else."

We hope Pink's better than that snowman who came by this morning. The snowman was a fraud--his carrot nose wasn't even real.
Elvis: "Who is this guy? I don't like him. I'm going to take him out."

"And who are these little guys? They make me nervous." Sun Tzu: "The art of using troops is this: when ten to the enemy's one, surround him..." (Thanks, Diana, for this reference to the great tactician who was nonetheless probably no match for the wiliness of a determined rabbit!)


He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stockings, then turned with a jerk,
And laying his paw aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose!

He sprang to his sleigh, gave the camel a whistle,
And way they both flew like the down of a thistle,
But I heard him exlaim, 'ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!

Merry Christmas to all my bunny and stitchy blogger friends! Pink, Elvis and Peaches send best wishes, and now they're going to chow down on their parsley and craisin "wreath."